The Day I Said Yes

Today is the second anniversary of our engagement. It is a story that makes me laugh, and laughter is something I need a little of today. 

Life happens in strange bursts when you live the military lifestyle. There are months of waiting and counting, finding ways to keep yourself focused on something other than the days, weeks, months that stand between you and your beloved’s homecoming. I truly believe deployments are where you learn how to communicate as a couple and strengthen your relationship. After they come home, it feels like a frantic race to make up for lost time, to soak in every moment of togetherness you can possibly handle, because it only a matter of time before they depart again. 

The story of our engagement happened in those little bursts of time together. Although we both knew fairly early in our relationship that this was “it” we had to contend with multiple deployments and TDYs throughout our relationship. After dating for only 4 months, we spent the majority of 2011 apart. During the brief summer break between deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan, Chris informed me shortly before leaving that he wanted to get engaged after he came home. For all his sarcasm, Chris was quite sentimental and wanted to be able to spend our early engagement days together. In his overly practical sort of way, he had decided we should be engaged before my brother’s wedding in July… that way there was no confusion on whether or not Chris should be in the family pictures.

I spent the next several months in nervous excitement. To keep from exploding, I told my best friend about our discussion, but did not mention it to anyone else. It just seemed weird to say that he was planning on proposing. And with deployments, there was always the fear that something could happen. He might not come back. He may come back changed and no longer wish to marry me. I didn’t want to jinx anything.

The return from Afghanistan was rather troublesome and frustrating. I had a small melt down on Valentine’s Day, when Chris was “stuck” in Germany and failed to send a quick email to say I love you. I was particularly sensitive at the time because I was away from home attending a conference, knowing I would miss his homecoming. I wanted that moment with him after so many months of waiting. I didn’t want him to be alone stepping off the bus.

When I returned home late the next night, Chris was waiting for me with the poster I taped to his windshield (with some minor edits) to welcome me back.

Professionally, the weeks that followed Chris’ return were hell. I was covering job responsibilities for two people and planning a huge event for the middle of March. In the midst of my work insanity, Chris went TDY for some training out west. Per usual, he re-routed his return trip to visit his parents in Washington. Unknown to me at the time, he bought the ring while he was home… and my best friend knew about it.

Before he left to return to Georgia, he had dinner with his mom. I later found out that she gave him a hard time about when he was going to propose. He smiled and told her nothing, the ring already stowed away in his bag pack.

In April, I was finally past most of the insanity for work and could schedule a much needed weekend away with Chris. Initially we planned to get away at the beginning of April, but I couldn’t take off that Monday from work. Instead, we did a biathlon. We re-scheduled our beach get-away the same weekend as the Rescue Ball. That detail matters in the sense that I probably would not remember the date of our engagement, had the ball not been on Friday the 13^th.

The morning following the ball, we left for Destin. Chris booked us a lovely little hotel room with a great view of the bay. Before leaving, I told myself (and my best friend) that this weekend was about relaxing and having fun together. While I knew Chris planned to propose, I didn’t want to walk into the weekend with any expectations. In short, I convinced myself that we would not get engaged that weekend.

When we got to the boardwalk that afternoon, I cut loose. It was my first chance in a long time to truly relax… with a few drinks. After a very strong, boozy slushy and a beer, I was quite pleasantly buzzed. I drank my beer as we watched part of a Flyers game at a beach bar, while the bar tender laughed at me. Like Chris, I am generally pleasant when intoxicated. Calm, but smiley and giggly.

Realizing there was no hope for me, Chris decided we should go back to the hotel for a little while so I could sober up. The ring, mean while, waiting in his pocket for the right moment. After an hour or so, we sat outside on the balcony enjoying our beautiful view and the perfect weather, our white plastic chairs side by side. The sun was just starting to set. Sober, but a little sleepy, I agreed with Chris that we should grab some dinner.

Before I could stand up to get ready, Chris said, “Before we go to dinner, I have a question to ask you.” He rolled out of his chair on to one knee and pulled the beautiful solitaire ring from his pocket. I still can’t fully remember if I actually said yes because I burst into tears.

The ring was perfect. Simple, elegant. Princess cut. I have never been one to salivate over rings, but I loved everything about the one he chose. I kept staring at it all night when he wasn’t looking. Finally, I had to admit to him that I couldn’t help myself and admired it openly.

The box the ring came in was huge. So when he proposed he only carried the ring itself with him. After he asked, he gave me the box, which included the matching wedding band. He told me he bought the set because he figured I would say yes.

We celebrated the next morning with a seaside brunch before we called to share the news with family. It was nice for it to be our moment for just a little while.

I love our story because it is so simple and true to us. We joked that I almost ruined it by getting a little drunk, which is exemplary of my awkward timing. The moment itself was private, I loved that we could share that moment without witness. I love Chris’ simple confidence that he would find the right moment, and that he understood me enough to know I would say yes.

So today, two years later, I think of him with love. So grateful for that question and all it has meant in our lives. Then, and now, the answer is always yes.